Monday, January 28, 2013

Everyone Leaves

my friend told me today that she will be switching schools next week.i feel like everyone is abandoning me. and a lady who was really nice and would look out for me ever since i was in 7th grade left too.that leaves 2 classmates on a regular basis.and Jess to be kinda happy with.i only have 4 more months to get through until i graduate.

Thursday, January 24, 2013

Wake Up Reality

i ended up accidentally falling asleep.
i got woken up with stressful news/an upset mom.
i started feeling really bad.
i got out a ruberband.
i went over my limit.
i dont want to sleep.
i dont want to eat.
i just want distractions.
           ... and a hot shower with green tea.

Happy Tree Friend Time

So last night I went to youth group and all my friends were there except for one because she was with her dad looking for a new rabbit because they starved the other one to death. It was nice getting to hang out and laugh and stuff. Jess spent the night. We watched The Office(bbc version), I painted both our nails, we talked about stuff, and fell asleep watching Happy Tree Friends on my bed together. I didn't sleep well at all though and all I want to do now is go home,drink tea,watch Supernatural (which I found out my Chemistry teacher also loves) and take a nap. However I am not allowed to take naps during the week and if I drink tea then I will exceed my calorie intake for today. So I plan on just going home and working out so I don't fall asleep. That way I can get it done early leaving the rest of my evening free.I possibly may go to bed early or watch the new episode of The Big Bang Theory or both:)

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Depression Please Cut To The Chase

   So I find myself not as gloomy the past two days.All of a sudden i feel better but I don't know how long it will last. My youth pastor spoke last Wednesday about taking control of our sins. If we don't recognize them and battle them they will take over and turn us into something that we will hate. That really spoke to me i guess and since then I've been trying to recognize the things trying to destroy me.
   Shelby is gone today. I love her and all but she keeps me from doing my work and always seems to have a negative attitude about everything.I struggle with that enough nowadays and I really don't need an extra dosage.
   I also have been thinking about keeping a journal.This blog is the closest thing i have but sometimes it's nice to pour my thought out on a piece of paper. I used to keep one until i found out that someone was reading it. Someday i think i will just write my thoughts and then burn them so no one will be able to read them.
   I also have started to watch Supernatural. I'ts pretty good.It's kinda scary too.There are about 140 episodes so that should keep me busy for awhile.

Sunday, January 20, 2013

Coma Day

So I slept for pretty much the whole day and when i was awake i stayed in bed most of the time. It was really nice to be able to sleep and i probably would have kept sleeping if my mom didn't freak out and wake me up. I was haveing nice dreams too which never happens and I could actually remember them which was even more awesome! i finished watching the BBC version of the Office. now i don't know what to watch. Iv'e tried watching Supernatural but I can't get past the first episode. I also went with my mom to get ice cream while listening to old school Owl City. I saw The Impossible last night which was such a great film. but i advise not seeing it if you are squemish. while i was at the cinemas i got my friend a poster. she's reading some book i think it's called Safe House or something and they had free posters for the movie.

Friday, January 18, 2013


The darts keep coming at me.
He said it would happen.
This war in my head i wish would just end.
But the world works against believers.

Thursday, January 17, 2013

Stall Me Stall Me

So I never thought it would take me 2 hours to figure out what new music I wanted on my iPod!So much for going to bed at a decent time.I do however have a new favorite dancey song called Under Cover Martyn by the Two Door Cinema Club.
now that i think of it the title reminds me of Martin Freeman.haha:)
I also got:

Wrecking Plans

so I'm thinking of working on my Wreck This Journal tonight.i feel the creativity coming back.maybe being artistic again will be the remedy. i doodled in class today and it was really nice to be able to just draw.

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Getting Low

Dusk Collision

i was so happy that these turned out amazing! the last time i tried marbleing was forever ago and i couldn't get it to work.

Friday, January 4, 2013

Nostalgia Chemical Dream

I've never been so thankful for my own bed,my own home,and routine. I was with a friend for a couple days and school started again so it's nice to get back into the swing of things. I had a dream about Gerard Way last night. I don't remember much all I know is that I liked it. I remember around this time last year my best friend and I were obsessed with My Chemical Romance. I love them still but I tend to have phases that come and go. Right now it's been Owl City/Adam Young but he never really goes away. I'm planning on putting Sky Sailing lyrics on my ceiling. It's going to rock!Also It seems like everyone around me is getting boyfriends/girlfriends what's going on!?!?